If I Had the Chance to Do It All Over Again…

Feb 23, 2020 | Kids & Family

Of all the opportunities I’ve been given in life, none has been so rewarding as being a parent to our four children. They are four of our greatest joys in life.

While it’s hard to imagine that this will be the first year that one of our children will leave home, I couldn’t be more thankful for the past nearly 18 years.

In reflecting back on these years, here are some things I’d do the same and some things I’d do differently if I had the chance to do it all over again: (I’ve written more extensively on each of these points below, so if any of them resonate, or you’d simply like to dive deeper, please click the appropriate links.)

3 things I’d do the same:

  1. WIN CONTROL EARLY. I firmly believe that ‘more control now, less control later‘ has proven itself true with all 4 of our children. If you parent them right during these early years, you’ve earned a golden ticket for your future parenting years! 
  2. INVEST INTO THEM SPIRITUALLY. Family devotions, scripture memory, and living out our faith together are things that I’ll never regret and always remember. Nothing matters more than your children learning how to personally walk with God. 
  3. BE A PARENT FIRST AND A FRIEND SECOND. No parent can afford to get this one wrong. Being a parent is tough. But it’s worth it. I consider my nearly 18-year-old son to be one of my closest friends, and no doubt he will continue to be. But it wasn’t always that way. Successful parenting requires that you be more afraid for your children than afraid of your children. This is key to a lifelong friendship. 

3 things I’d do differently:

  1. ENJOY MORE OF THE LITTLE MOMENTS. I know, they’re so easy to pass up, but they’re so hard to get back. How many times did I say no, when looking back now, I wish I would have said yes? 
  2. HUG THEM DAILY. More often, not less, is not a bad thing. No matter their age, no matter whether they like it, on good days and bad, I would make sure to hug them daily.  
  3. TAKE A CHILL PILL. Kids will be kids. If you fail to learn how to properly respond to this, you can cause a lot of unnecessary and even life-long damage in the heart of your child. Direct and discipline them – Yes. Degrade or demean them – Never.

Just a few thoughts… if I had the chance to do it all over again.