Happy New Year! The start of a new year is a great time to re-evaluate your life and your goals. Many people do it, and for good reason. But oftentimes those goals are centered primarily around personal things like health, work, new accomplishments, etc.
But what if we took time to evaluate even more important and lasting things like our marriage and our parenting.
Here are two great evaluations (Free PDFs) you might want to consider:
- Parenting: 12 Honest Questions to Ask Your Kids As You Enter a New Year
- Marriage: End of Year Marriage Checklist (How are you doing in the 5 marriage stress points?)
But for today, I want to challenge you to ask yourself these 5 thought-provoking questions as you intentionally evaluate your own parenting for the coming year.
1. Can I name a single area I know my child needs to grow in this coming year?
Maybe it’s a character trait, a discipline, or a relationship. What’s your plan to help them experience growth in this area? Wherever you’d like them to be, can you come up with a strategy and a detailed direction for how to get them there? Don’t just shoot in the wind hoping for the best. Discuss this with your spouse and come up with a written game plan.
2. What is something I suspect is going on in my child’s life that I either know little about, or they wouldn’t want me to know about?
Kids have secrets and ongoing temptations just like adults. Sadly, there are many things that often fly under the radar in our children’s hearts and lives that really matter. Simple accountability measures and device filters can be a huge help with this. Because many of kids’ secrets happen in their “fourth” (digital) world. (Our family uses two great filtering services—Accountable to You and VidAngel.)
3. What is something I could do with, or help my child accomplish, this year that would mean the world to them?
Every kid has something in their heart that they would love to try, achieve, or be able to say they’ve experienced. For my boys this past year it was going to their first NBA game (we had a blast).
4. On a scale of 1-10, how is my child’s relationship with God?
And how could you facilitate further spiritual growth in their heart and life this year? Maybe it’s getting them a new devotional or Bible, encouraging weekly accountability to church or their small group, or daily praying together as a family.
5. What is one thing 10 years from now that I will regret not having done or changed about myself or my family that is affecting my kids?
Whether it’s failing to show affection or simply saying “I love you.” Maybe it’s a bad habit of yelling or always assuming the worst rather than the best. Or maybe a regret of putting work, hobbies, or something else before your family. Why not change that this year? That’s something I guarantee you won’t regret.
If you’re having a hard time answering any of these questions, why not turn the tables and just ask them to your kids for the answers:
- What has been one of your greatest struggles this past year, or an area you feel God is working in your heart that needs to change?
- Has anything happened in your life in the last year that I don’t know about, or that you think I should know about?
- What is a specific dream, goal, event, or adventure that you’d love for us to experience together in the coming year?
- On a scale of 1-10, how are things between you and God?… Can you explain why you chose that specific number?
- What is one thing you wish you could change about our family?
If you take the time to ask or answer any of these questions, feel free to let me know how it goes, or how I can be praying for you and your family.
And remember, very few things in life carry the weight of responsibility and the potential of lifelong rewards as much as the investments you make into your children.
As you strive to be intentional, may 2024 be your family’s best year yet!
